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Building Business Relationships in the Francophone Diaspora
By Angelika Blendstrup, Ph.D, Ale Gicqueau, and Pierre-Jean Charra
1. What to know when building relationships with and among the French
Forget everything you have heard or read about the French as you get ready for a French networking event. Much of it is based on cultural stereotypes which don’t apply to an entire population anyway, and even less so for those French who have come to the US and particularly to Silicon Valley to work and live. We all have preconceived ideas – the French about the Americans and the Americans about the French – but in order to get the most out of the networking experience, ideas like these need to be checked at the door. Above all, most of these ideas are based on past behavior, but French networking behavior is now undergoing a revolution.
We will begin by giving you some general advice on how to be efficient in a French networking session, and then we will tell you what has changed recently.
The important thing, and that which will bring value to meeting French professionals, is to be very aware of the cultural differences and make them work for, not against you.
The French, as other Europeans do, work to live, whereas it is said that the Americans live to work. This difference in itself is significant, as relationships for the French supercede the task at hand. By paying attention to building these relationships, and showing how much you enjoy being with their groups, you start to make inroads to becoming a part of a French networking community. Many French belong to groups established through family, political, or school ties, which began long before they came to the US. As a result, the best way to approach people at French events is to have someone take you around and introduce
you. That way you will be able to pick up quickly who’s who and people will be able to know who you are as well.
Before coming to a meeting, it is ideal to have some background on France’s historical and cultural past, as many discussions will make some reference to things in the past and you will be expected to understand them. The French also have an extremely selective school and university system and it is good to know which are the Grandes Ecoles (the elite universities), since many people working in the US have gone to one of the elite schools and want you to recognizethe importance of having gone through this difficult system. Within France, an engineering degree from a Grande Ecole is widely considered more prestigious than a Ph.D. , and even more so than a JD or a MD. The whole school system is different. Without getting into the 4-year maitrise and the Classes Preparatoires, you can hardly understand how it works. On top of it, the early schooling,(elementary and secondary) with its long day, is more comprehensive than the US program. Latin, Greek, classics, history of civilizations: French people are major candidates to winning most Jeopardy shows.
If you studied French in high school or have traveled to France and learned some words and phrases, now is the time to dust off your old French verbs and get back to the language as actively as you can. You will have a distinct advantage if you can communicate with them in French, not in English (however, only if they understand you  .
French men and women are schooled to approach problems and issues from a theoretical point of view. They typically go through the classic process of thesis, antithesis, and synthesis and weigh all the options before making commitments. By comparison, Americans typically reach their decisions fast and count on optimizing them along the way to arriving at a solution. When listening to people debate issues, understand where they are coming from if the discussion goes on for quite a while. Realize as well that the French like to have a discussion for discussion’s sake, because it is here that they can demonstrate and enjoy eloquence and logical thinking processes (assuming the participants possess those desirable attributes).
The French will also make references in conversations that are hidden within other meanings, and they will not spell out everything (sous-entendus). The French are typically a more implicit culture, whereas the Americans are used to thinking and acting more explicitly. It is possible to decode much of what the French are saying if you are versed in the current and past history, and the politics of France and also its position in the European Union and the rest of the world. The French like to speak of their rich past, which for them explains the present, while Americans are more interested in the future.
Count on the form of communication being different from what you are used to in a group of Americans. Expect lots of interruptions and everyone talking at once in a seemingly heated argument (which in fact is just a normal discussion), much gesticulation, and possibly, when they are talking to you, they might be talking to others at the same time while attending to a third thing. This is not a sign of disrespect; the French like to multitask and will do it wherever they feel they can.
Don’t expect everyone to come on time. Time is often relative, especially when it comes to attending events which are more social than business. You will also notice people stand closer to each other in groups than you would see in an all American gathering and lots of touching, hugging and kissing will go on between the opposite as well as the same sexes. Enjoy it and go with the flow.
The French will have good food and drink at networking events because food is important; sharing it and a good glass of wine makes building rapport enjoyable. That’s what networking with the French is all about. Enjoy the camaraderie, enjoy getting to know people, work on getting to know them – the business part will follow, all in good time.
Even if the French seem carefree and open to discussing everything, certain conversational taboos do exist. They will talk about politics, religion, sex or even death. However, do not bring up problems within their families or refer to or inquire about money, unless you know someone really well and are considered an insider and real friend (even then, asking about their salary makes you an outcast. It’s a “gaffe”). Most importantly, if you leave a group with
a comment such as “let’s have lunch or coffee”, or, “I’ll call you”, you should follow up and really carry out what you suggested, or you will lose any credibility you have previously gained.
Do not forget a business lunch in France lasts often more than 2 hours, and this is where and when business is done; this is the way the French build their business rapport. Without this kind of relationship, it is unlikely that you will develop a solid business relationship with them.
Most French, besides the younger generation, do not like to network online. Culturally speaking, the French build trust by meeting a few times around a table or when they are introduced by a close contact. Unlike in the USA, where trust is granted automatically when the parties agree on a win-win task, in France, it has to be earned by building a personal relationship. As trust is earned mostly through non-verbal communication, the French rely on online networking only when it is an extension of an existing relationship or when they assume they share the same values by being part of the same network or community.
In other words, online networking is more effective for maintaining a relationship than for starting or building a relationship. That said, the younger generation is much more Internet-friendly (and certainly the French are very heavy users of text-messaging), however, we can expect online networking to grow in importance over time.
2. Main French networking organizations
There are only a few large French networking organizations and many very small groups in the United States. This situation can be explained as much by the individualist nature of the culture as by the desire of the French to create deeper or more meaningful business or social relationships within a smaller group. Most French groups in the United States will have a social, cultural or outdoor dimension; however, there are a few professional organizations worth noting. One international French social and cultural organization is worth noting in particular because of its great popularity: l’Alliance Française.
Name: L’Alliance Française
Website: http://www.afusa.org/
Focus: Promotion of the French language and culture
Number of Members/attendees:
CEO/Organizer: His Excellency Jean-David Levitte, French ambassador
Fees: most Alliance Françaises are self-financed by teaching French classes to the Francophile community. In addition, the French government sponsors the largest Alliance Françaises in the USA like New-York or San Francisco by sending them an executive director.
Founded: 1902
Description: L’Alliance Française is the world’s largest French teaching association, with over 1000 schools in 129 countries. Their aim is to widen access to French language and culture, to encourage education, cultural exchange and a friendly dialogue among France and other countries. They are a social and cultural club, and do not offer general, professional networking events. They are ideal for Francophiles who want to get a taste of the French culture and/or learn French. Many of them have a French CineClub where films are shown in French. Most Alliance Française are independent and self-sustained; however, there are a few which are sponsored by the French government and are more prominent in their community, e.g., the Alliance Française of New-York.
French professional organizations are more an exception than a standard. In large cities, there are a few you can contact.
Name: The French-American Chamber of Commerce
Website: http://www.faccnyc.org/facc_chapters.html
Focus: French traditional networking, particularly for purposes of promoting French-US trade
President: Jean-Pierre Bernard
Fees: 1/3 from membership, 1/3 from events, 1/3 from sponsors.Founded: 1896
Founded: 1896
Description:
The French American Chamber of Commerce (FACC) has been opening borders between the United States and France. A private non-profit, commercial service organization, the FACC offers 20 US chapters and liaison chapters in Paris, all dedicated to the promotion of French-American trade and investment.
They have the following goals:
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SPEAK. WRITE. EXPRESS. ENGAGE.